The person my clinicians never got to meet

The author spent five months in a psychiatric intensive care unit. During this period, all staff knew the reason for their hospitalization. However, almost nobody knew the author as a person. The author recalls moments when they realized they had become a patient first and a person second. Clinicians often sought explanations for their distress in medical records or previous handovers. They seemed to assume the same reason for distress every day. New staff gave the impression they already knew the author based on their diagnosis, risk profile, and history from medical records, even before exchanging a single word.